Cops and Hornets

So when I got to the house to pick up an item I had bought on the web the door was unlocked but no one was there.  I decided to sit on the back deck and just see if anyone showed up.  After a minute, someone did.  It was a Hornet.  I think his name was Matt.  Well it was apparent from the get go that Matt didn’t like me, and to be honest, I didn’t much care for him either.  After running from him around the deck for a while I decided to make a mad dash down the stairs, risking a fall that could result in a broken leg, concussion or worse, being stung my Matt!  I safely made it to the bottom, or at least I thought I did.  The instant I hit the bottom step, hovering right in front of my face was Kevin, Matt’s meaner brother.  Now, it’s true that Matt had a giant stinger, but the second I saw Kevin’s, I knew Matt had some serious stinger envy, let’s just leave it at that…..I said leave it!!  Kevin and Matt chased me around the yard for several minutes while I dodged them with my cartoon roadrunner like speed, and frightened them with my injured cat in heat like screeching.  Afterward I couldn’t stop crying so I went into the house to calm down.  I was tired from the ordeal so I laid down on the couch.  Some time later I awoke and noticed the front door was ajar.  Did I leave it open?  I couldn’t recall.  I checked to make sure the house was still empty.  It was.  I was dehydrated from the running and the crying so I opened the fridge.  Jackpot!  The Sunny D felt cool and refreshing going down.  I put my clothes back on (I had taken them off of course, no one wants to sleep in urine soaked clothes) and just got the hell out of there before anyone came home.

On an unrelated note, while I was heading down the street, from the other direction the cops

came speeding around the corner with sirens blaring.  They pulled right up to the house I had been at and ran inside!  Can you believe it, less than 30 seconds after I had been there, a crime had apparently been committed!