Run Like a Girl-see post story thoughts

Most people know about my fear of bees.  Anyone who hangs around me outdoors for ten minutes becomes aware of this, based on the shrieking they hear every time a leaf falls off a tree, or when my peripheral vision is invaded by a butterfly.  And if the little boy next door reports to me that a wasp has been spotted in the neighborhood, you will see a grown man hike up his shorts and run screaming for the door (picture a little girl in a long dress running across a shallow stream if you must get a visual)! Wasps are the worst.  They aren’t in it for the honey, they just sting out of the passion to inflict pain.  They must be destroyed!

What’s that?  You’re scowling at me now?  Oh, you love all animals and insects and wouldn’t wish harm on even a wasp?  What about a wasp that stings a little puppy?   Barking and playing and innocent….YELP!  Stung by a wasp!  ‘What just happened to me?’ he thinks,  ‘Why are they doing this to me, was I wagging my tail too hard?’

‘Were my lil’ puppy eyes too big and brown?’  ‘What have I done to deserve such pain?’  ‘Ok, (he thinks) I need to calm down and figure it out.  Hmm…for starters, I promise I’ll never poop outside again. That must be why I was punished, for soiling the grass.  Indoors only from now on!’

Well.  You get the idea.  That’s only the beginning of this poor puppy’s confusing little life all brought on by a wasp.  And don’t get me started on what happened when he got pelted by a chunk of hail.  So please don’t be so quick to judge or snicker at the guy who, like me, runs for his can of Raid Wasp and Hornet Killer halfway through mowing the lawn, then, after spraying everything that moves and everything that doesn’t move but looks like it COULD move, then moseys on back to the house and grabs one of his back-up cans of Raid Wasp and Hornet Killer!  So try it. I’m sure SC Johnson (A Family Company) will thank you for your unusual support. And maybe, just maybe, your puppy will thank you too.

POST STORY THOUGHTS:  I wrote this story a number of years ago when saying ‘Run like a girl’ wasn’t so much thought of as a sexist stereotype.  It was back in the day when people thought Men and Women were different from each other.  Not that one was better or worse, just different.  I mean, I would LOVE to be able to run like Jackie Joyner-Kersee, but I can’t!  So running like THAT girl would be an incredible thing!  I guess I should rename the story ‘Run like a person who for no particular reason is not used to running because he or she grew up doing other things and didn’t participate in lots of running activities, so when he or she runs it looks unusual compared to say, a baseball player or Jackie Joyner Kersee, so yeah, run like that!’.  You know what?  That has a nice ring to it!