Top Other Reasons to Wear a Mask

Stick your tongue out at whomever you want, whenever you want!   (Other tongue gestures optional)

Insert food, replace mask, chew with mouth open.

Confuses all the dogs (Cats still unimpressed)

Horses smugly think it’s a feedbag!  “We’ve been doing that forever” said no horse because they can’t even talk…stupid horses.

Use it as a feedbag!  Ok maybe they’re not that dumb.

It gives you a really cool round tan line.

It’s a great workout for your now much stronger ears!  Gimme the biggest hoop earrings you’ve got, I can finally handle it.

We all look like robbers! That’s good, right? In case you want to rob a bank you’re already halfway there.  “Yes officer he was wearing a mask”.  Said a horse.  It was one of those rare talking ones.

I can finally and easily answer that age old question: Do I have bad breath?  YES, YES I DO!!!

Your popped bubblegum bubbles will never get stuck in your hair! Well, maybe your nose hair.

Invert the mask and you have yourself a handy dental dam!  Root canal anyone?

Super easy to do cardio because you pass out in 9 minutes.

Guess we put all those lip readers out of business.  Is there a lip reading business?  “Not anymore” said a horse without moving his lips.

If you forget to wash the mask and it gets hard and crusty you can use it as a ‘cup’.  Girls, wait till you have two like this and viola, strapless bra.   (Work with me here!)